TWMDS
Changing to a value-based life.
"Death is not the greatest loss in life. The greatest loss is what dies inside us while we live." - Norman Cousins
10MEN
10MEN: Building friendships through self-discovery and connection.
Being vulnerable is healthy.
Vulnerability is a key value and skill that some men need to learn, and this is a fact that should not be met with shame or worry. It takes courage and vulnerability to learn about emotions and other areas that may be unfamiliar, just as it takes knowledge and skill to learn about cars and other practical matters. There is nothing wrong with seeking to improve and grow, no matter what subject you are exploring.
Deeper connections in relationships
By being open and honest about what's going on inside of you, you allow others to understand you better and create a foundation for more meaningful and fulfilling connections. This level of self-awareness and self-expression is also essential for maintaining mental health and well-being.
Find common ways you are not alone.
By participating in 10Men, you can learn about vulnerability, explore your emotions, and find common ways in which you are not alone.
10MEN Series
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10MEN is a group program designed to facilitate open communication and deepen connections in relationships through the use of the 36 questions of Love. The program is specifically geared towards men and aims to help them explore their emotions, find their voice, and enhance their relationships through self-reflection and introspection.
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Anyone who identifies as a man and is interested in exploring their thoughts, feelings, and values in a supportive group setting is welcome to participate in 10MEN.
There is no cost to participate in the group, as it is free.
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The group follows a structured format, each participant taking turns answering three weekly questions. Group members are encouraged to listen attentively and show respect for each person's answers, and there is time allocated for group discussion and reflection after each question. Each group has a facilitator with experience in Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), and the focus is on creating a safe and supportive environment for sharing and connection.
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WHY?
There are several reasons why a program like 10MEN might be helpful:
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Self-reflection and introspection: By answering the 36 questions of Love and participating in group discussions, 10MEN participants can reflect on their thoughts, feelings, and values. This can help them gain insight into their own patterns of behaviour and understand more about themselves.
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Building stronger relationships: 10MEN encourages open communication and vulnerability, which can help participants build stronger connections and relationships with others. Sharing personal thoughts and feelings with others can create a sense of trust, which can benefit all types of relationships.
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Emotional growth: By exploring their emotions and learning more about themselves and their relationships, 10MEN participants may experience emotional growth and development. This can help them better understand their emotional experiences and improve their ability to manage and express emotions.
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Support and friendship: 10MEN provides a safe and supportive environment for participants to share and connect with others. This can help participants find friendship and support within the group, which can be particularly helpful for men who may not have many other outlets for discussing their thoughts and feelings.
A program like 10MEN can be helpful for men who are looking to explore their thoughts, feelings, and values in a structured and supportive setting. It can provide an opportunity for self-reflection, relationship-building, emotional growth, support, and friendship.
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36 Questions
of Love.
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The 36 questions of Love are a set of prompts designed to encourage self-reflection and facilitate communication with others. These questions are meant to be thought-provoking and encourage people to explore their thoughts, feelings, and values more deeply.
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The 36 questions of Love are not specifically designed for any relationship but are intended to be used in all types of relationships. This includes romantic relationships, friendships, family relationships, and professional relationships.
By answering the 36 questions and sharing your answers with someone else, you can gain insight into your thoughts, feelings, and values and learn more about the person you are talking with. This can help improve communication and deepen connection in any relationship.
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Here are three ways that listening to others' answers can improve communication:
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Increased understanding: By actively listening to others' answers, you can gain a better understanding of their thoughts, feelings, and perspectives. This can help you see things from their point of view and may lead to more empathy and understanding when dealing with others.
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Improved problem-solving: When you listen carefully to others' answers, you can gather more information and context that may be useful in solving problems or resolving conflicts. This can help you identify potential solutions and make more informed decisions in your own life.
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Stronger relationships: Listening to others' answers and showing genuine interest in what they say can help strengthen your relationships. It can create a sense of trust and respect and may lead to more open and honest communication. These are skills we all can learn and practice.
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Here are three ways that the 36 questions of Love can encourage self-reflection:
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Personal growth: By answering the questions, you may discover new things about yourself and your own thoughts, feelings, and values. This can help you understand yourself better and encourage personal growth and development.
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Insight into patterns of behaviour: The 36 questions may prompt you to reflect on your past experiences and behaviours, which can help you gain insight into your own behaviour patterns. This can help identify areas where you may want to make changes or improvements.
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Improved communication and connection with others: By answering the questions and sharing your answers with others, you can improve communication and deepen your connection with others. This can be particularly helpful in relationships where communication may be strained or where you may feel disconnected from others.
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Overall, 10MEN is an opportunity for men to explore their thoughts, feelings, and values through self-reflection and introspection, develop a deeper understanding of themselves and their patterns of behaviour in relationships, build stronger connections and relationships with others through open communication and vulnerability, and experience emotional growth as they learn more about themselves and their relationships. It is a free program that is open to any man who is interested in participating.
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My Story
I believe that ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy) can change your life, just as it changed mine. Through workbooks, exercises, and personal experiences, I have learned to persist and build my own style of defusion that helps me cope with difficult situations. I clearly understand the values that are important to me and the life I want to lead, even when things don't go as planned or when I face challenges.
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My unique upbringing has given me a deep understanding of suffering and has allowed me to survive and thrive. I have spent over 10,000 hours practicing defusion, mindfulness, meditation, and acceptance. While this may make me an expert in my own experiences, the most important thing is that these techniques have helped me live a more engaged and fulfilling life.
To embark on this journey with ACT, you will need the following:
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Willingness and acceptance: You need to be open to applying these exercises to your life and accepting that what you learn and understand is your own experience.
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Skepticism and curiosity: You should approach this journey with a healthy dose of skepticism and be willing to see where it takes you.
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Honesty: While I will not ask you to share your personal life or story, it is important to be honest when working through the ACT exercises. I am here to guide you through the process, not judge you.
Ultimately, these things have in common that they require you to show up for yourself. It's not about paying me or anyone else; it's about committing to yourself and learning how to live your life. If you are willing to try something for free and show up for yourself, you may be surprised at what you can achieve.
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